


Abysmal

by RileySteele



Category: League of Legends
Genre: I'm not sorry, M/M, Yaoi, yordle smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-09
Updated: 2015-02-10
Packaged: 2018-03-06 21:41:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,394
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3149426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RileySteele/pseuds/RileySteele
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Some genius decided to create a team of yordles, thus forcing Veigar to 'make friends' lest he lose every match. Teemo is too pleased about this. (Somewhat PWP. You have been warned.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Welcome to the Jungle

**Author's Note:**

> Chapter warnings: None this time. We'll get to the good stuff later, promise!

Abysmal. That was the word stuck in Veigar's head on a day like today.

The master of evil had hardly even started the day, and yet it was already, like most of them, a bad one. He was stuck following the fluffy butt of the most obnoxious yordle in the universe, and all because he was entirely too devoted to being victorious.

For some reason beyond anyone's comprehension, Veigar had found himself being placed, more and more often, on a team full of yordles. Heimerdinger top, Tristana and Lulu bot, himself mid and Teemo, his "companion" today, in the jungle.

Teemo was an abysmal jungler. Absolutely abysmal. Had he asked the impatient Tristana for help? Perhaps the constantly smiling presence of Lulu, or even the tactical Heimerdinger?

No. He had insisted that Veigar, the mid lane terror, come with him, as mid lanes and junglers were "special friends."

He had hoped beyond hope that the little fuzzball would want to do this alone. By nature, Teemo was rather solitary. Yet, even he knew that the jungle was a dangerous place, not to be trifled with. So here he was, listening to the obnoxious voice of his teammate as they scoured the jungle, with Teemo struggling against various, admittedly souped-up monsters and Veigar looking on, unimpressed.

By the time they reached level 15, both of the small champions were exhausted. A million mantras of "do it for the kills" had been going through Veigar's head, and only now were they starting to wan as Teemo stopped dead in the center of the mid lane and turned to him.

"I think I've got this now."

"Finally," came from Veigar. He sounded more irritated than he really was, of course... That was just his way. "I'll trust you won't make a total idiot of yourself on the field tomorrow?"

"You should have lower expectations. You're less likely to be disappointed," the fluffier of the two commented. A surprisingly dark statement from the optimist. Perhaps Veigar's very presence was rubbing off on him. "Let's get out of here. Hey, come have dinner with us!"

"Us," the other yordles. Inevitably they flocked together in the mess hall, joined on occasion by some of the human female champions. ...Or Ezreal, Ezreal was also a visitor. They flocked to the smaller champions sometimes for the simple excuse of wanting to pet and snuggle them, something the yordles seemed to enjoy and Veigar would NEVER understand.

"I would rather eat my own staff," Veigar quickly assured him. In reality, if he ate in the company of anyone, it would be Vel'Koz, or Malzahar, or perhaps even Ryze if the mage stayed quiet for at least half of the meal.

Teemo only shrugged, as he often did around Veigar and his attitude. "Maybe tomorrow then."

And again, as always, he hurried off before the protest could even rise on Veigar's evil little vocal cords.

~

Their matches the next day were, as Veigar could have predicted, abhorrent. Tristana fell all over herself, Heimerdinger played entirely too risky, and Lulu? Oh, Lulu was the absolute worst, being, for some reason, completely selfish with her spells and thus losing the help of her marksman. So there was, honestly, nothing Teemo could have done to save the match.

Yet somehow it seemed unfair to let him get away without one of Veigar's famous rants of hatred. Even the enemy champions seemed to feel awkward in the face of the poison dripping in his voice.

Teemo only shrugged, as he often did when being verbally ripped to shreds. "Maybe next time."

And then he was gone.

~

The champions were very often rotated. It was simply a fact of life. Whoever had decreed that an all-yordle team (not that Veigar would ever identify with those creatures again) was viable had their doubts about the top lane. Kennen was attempted and quickly discarded. Corki was a shot in the dark, even more terrible than the previous two options. Finally, at long last, a decent fit was found in Amumu.

Finally, someone on the team that Veigar hated more than Teemo. The dead yordle was even more of an outcast than the dark mage, as he preferred to spend his time with Annie and Tibbers. A human and a spirit bear demon thing were not beings that encouraged social interaction.

Yet Veigar sighted the little girl, the bear, and the mummy sitting at the yordle table that very night. For once in a very long time, the master of evil felt a bit of a twinge.

"Jealousy," Vel'Koz droned very close to his ear.

The emergency team had to extract the fork from his eye right there in the mess hall.

~

The next day was better. Not amazing, but better. Amumu actually held his lane, though Lulu and Tristana were still very, very rocky in what Teemo called their "bot lane romance." Veigar had actually had to fight not to giggle when Tristana bruised up his shoulder for the sentiment.

That night, though, something strange happened. In the very middle of his meal, Veigar felt something wiggling up near his side. In a moment, Teemo had squeezed in between him and Ryze, and plopped his tray down on the table. Tristana was with him, though she simply stood to the side, watching to see what would occur.

"May I help you?" Veigar spoke through his teeth, almost in a hiss. Teemo was not impressed.

"Thought I'd come over and eat with you guys." He stuffed a bit of an apple into his mouth and crunched. Tristana seemed to smile a little, further irritating the dark mage.

"I'll see you later, then," Ryze muttered, quickly retreating, Malzahar following rather quickly.

Tristana sat across from him, and, as if nothing had happened, the two started talking again. Dozens of pairs of eyes were on the Table of Darkness now, incredibly aware of what was happening. Most attentive were the other members of their team, at the Table of Yordle (and girl and bear.)

For some reason, Veigar did not find it in himself to get up. Perhaps he thought that the two would end up following him if he moved, or even left the room, and so sat there, trying not to get more irritated, trying to ignore them, and did not eat another bite.

~

Over the next few days, there were a lot of changes. Lulu's magic was one of those changes, in the form of tweaks to her abilities, sending her into quite a rage. She took out this rage at the Table of Darkness at meal times, or, as the other champions now referred to it, the Table of What the Actual Fuck. Veigar's normally tolerated companions had rotated to a different table, Annie and Tibbers had returned to their original table, and the yordle team was newly united in the battlefield of breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

Every day it grew somewhat less awkward, though Veigar remained mostly silent, ate a few bites, and then deserted them all in favor of retreating to his room. Silent, at least, until the day Ziggs attacked.

Or, rather, until Ziggs tripped. Ziggs was the kind of yordle that could simply fall, land on his face, and have bombs go everywhere, and, essentially, that was the lunchtime event of the day.

One bomb landed on Caitlyn's hat, quickly swatted off by Vi. One landed in Nunu's hood, exploding instantly and making him jump several feet out of his chair. And one landed directly on the middle of the table in front of the yordles, bouncing right into a plate of spaghetti.

Teemo moved fast. In a moment, Veigar found himself on the ground, with the scout on top of him, making himself a shield. Lulu's high-pitched scream rang out as food flew everywhere. It made a weird squishy slap noise, and Teemo shivered at the feel of it in his fur. Veigar was the one at the table left unharmed, the only one who had been "saved."

Teemo had chosen, in a moment of shock, to protect him. Not his girlfriend Tristana, or the slow reacting tank Amumu, or Lulu who had her rage issues and was now trying to beat Ziggs unconscious with a noodle.

"Get..." Veigar's voice was higher than usual, almost embarrassed. "Get off of me, you cretin! This is no way to treat a master of dark magic!"

Teemo turned his head for a moment, meeting his eyes, and then quickly glanced at a shocked Tristana. In a second he'd scrambled off, almost like the gaze burned, and, shoving a chair aside on the way, he escaped the room.

"Oh, dammit," Tristana growled, wiping a bit of spaghetti sauce off her cheek and turning to follow. "Teemo, hey!"

He remained on the ground for a long time before rising, making a hasty exit, and returning to the sanctity of his room.

~

In the end, Lulu and Ziggs were the only two who got in any kind of trouble, getting a simple lecture from the tribunal.

Teemo did not appear the next day. The official report was something about a glitch in his ability coding.

Veigar didn't subscribe to that and made it a point to go and sort out this nonsense himself. He knocked on the plain door, three times, and waited, half hoping there would be no answer.

But the door opened, and Teemo stood there, looking cautious.

"I'm really sorry I knocked you over yesterday. I over-reacted," he said by way of greeting.

"Good," Veigar grumbled. "Now get back on the field, Gnar is your stand-in and I can't take another moment of it."

"I'd really like to be alone right now."

Veigar quickly placed his void staff in the doorway before Teemo could retreat, catching the door on it.

"Me too. The world is not a wish granting factory."

"Veigar," it was the first time he had used his actual name, instead of some silly "sir" or "you." "I'm asking you to leave me alone."

"What are you so afraid of?"

"Tristana is my best friend and I went for you," he got out, his voice sounding oddly dark. It sent a weird shiver over Veigar's spine. "I saved you."

"...She break up with you or something?" Veigar managed, recovering fast. Teemo shook his head slightly, trying to push the staff out of the doorway with little success.

"I don't know why everyone thinks that about us."

"You're always together."

"She's my best friend," Teemo repeated. "And she wasn't mad at me. She should have been mad."

"Get over yourself!" Veigar drew the staff back, only to smack Teemo on the head with it. Thunk. "I don't care who you saved or who you're snogging or anything, I care about winning!"

"Well I care about you! I care about you, and you hate me, and that's awful but I can't stop!"

Pure silence for one beat. Two. Three. Then, finally, Veigar found himself being shoved back, and the door slammed in his face as the words echoed in his ears like some cruel chorus.


	2. In All My Dreams I Drown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Veigar gets more than he bargained for when he "makes nice" with Teemo.

Everything was all business on the field. The yordles, as a group, saw less of Teemo than ever, as he attempted to, in Tristana's words, work out his shit.

After about a week, Veigar came to a scary conclusion. It simply wasn't as fun to yell at any of the others. Even Amumu had disappointing, sniffling reactions, completely unsatisfying.

So, for the second time in his entire career as master of evil, Veigar reached out. He followed Teemo once he had left a game, ignoring Lulu's catcalls and Tristana's exclamations, even some shocked mutterings from the other team, snared the scout with his powers, and approached him.

"You should have dinner with us tonight," the dark mage ground out through a tensed jaw, staring Teemo down long after the stun had subsided.

By some miracle, he managed to keep from attacking when he felt arms wrap around his shoulders, and a small, furry body press up against him. A hug. He'd heard of those before, but couldn't remember having any. This one...

It was warm.

That night, when he closed his eyes, for the first time in years he saw more than just darkness.

~

_Teemo was just an odd creature. On the battlefield, nothing had changed, but in the mess hall and, as time went on, as they spent more free time around each other, he was affectionate. He would always insist on sitting by Veigar, or maybe holding his clawed metal hand. It was incredibly strange. It was a bit suffocating. The hugs were happening more and more often._

_Veigar couldn't get enough._

_~_

_The kissing happened one night as they were simply sitting in silence, looking out over the rift. It happened, and Veigar felt like he was drowning, and Teemo was apologetic because he immediately assumed the other didn't want things that way._

_And the master of evil learned how to properly shut up a babbling scout with his mouth._

_~_

_Veigar had once thought Teemo's voice was obnoxious, headache-inducing._

_That was before he'd accidentally grazed a cold claw over the scout's chest, getting the metal just up against the skin, and heard him moan for the first time._

_It was as if something had switched in him, and his hands were all over the damned raccoon, clawing and pulling at his fur, drawing such sinful sounds from him, teeth sinking into his neck._

_Which was when he seemed to notice what he was doing and quickly pulled back, an actual "sorry" forming on his tongue._

_It died instantly when Teemo looked at him, so pathetically, and opened his mouth, letting out a soft pant and a very quiet "don't stop."_

_So he didn't._

__

~

It only made sense that he woke up in a terrified cold sweat (at least, that was the closest thing he could compare it to) with a scream caught in his throat. After such a horrible nightmare, how could he expect any different? Becoming... _amorous_ with Teemo of all creatures? It had to be the work of Nocturne. He supposed he should be grateful that he woke when he did, before... A horrified shudder met the thought.

That night, he skipped dinner, supposing no one would question his absence.

Not for the first time, he was completely incorrect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one features a dream sequence for the simple fact that the original scenes felt rushed. I wanted to make a proper story out of this, and in the process came up with a plot actually involving the originals. If that makes any sense. Also why it's short compared to the other chapter, since I'd rather take my time with editing so I don't wreck this entirely. Feel free to tell me what you think.


End file.
